Unmasking the Emotions: Understanding After School Meltdowns

Hello there! Today, we're going to delve deep into the reasons why children, especially neurodivergent children, might experience strong emotions after school. We will focus particularly on the impact of masking, and how to help them cope. Let's dive in!

What is masking?

Masking is a term used to describe a common behavior, especially among neurodivergent individuals, where they consciously or unconsciously hide their true selves in social situations. It's like putting on a mask to fit in and conform to societal expectations. For neurodivergent children (particularly those with conditions like autism) this can involve imitating expected behaviors, suppressing natural responses, and camouflaging their true thoughts and emotions. While masking can help them navigate social interactions, it can also be emotionally exhausting and lead to a sense of disconnection from their authentic selves. Understanding masking is crucial for supporting neurodivergent individuals in being comfortable with who they truly are.

Sensory Overload:

After a full day at school or daycare, neurodivergent kids might experience sensory overload. The bustling classroom, fluorescent lights, noisy hallways – it can all be overwhelming. This sensory bombardment can lead to meltdowns or shutdowns once they're back in a familiar, less stimulating environment.

Social Fatigue:

Many neurodivergent children find social interactions draining. School or daycare often require constant social engagement, which can leave them emotionally drained by the end of the day. The pressure to "fit in" and navigate social situations can be exhausting.

Emotional Release:

Sometimes, neurodivergent children hold in their emotions and stress throughout the school day. When they return home or to a safe environment, they may release these pent-up feelings in the form of tears, frustration, or anger. This emotional release is a natural response to the day's challenges but also note and keep track of specifics as triggers may be hiding.

Communication Challenges:

Neurodivergent children might struggle to articulate their feelings or communicate their needs effectively. This frustration can lead to emotional outbursts, as they grapple with the gap between their thoughts and their ability to express them. Some children with ADHD etc. may be easily triggered or quick to temper regardless of communication style or ability.

How to Help Neurodivergent Children:

Provide a Safe Space:

Create a safe, calming environment at home where your child can decompress. You can even implement in the car on the ride home as well if you pick-up your kiddo. A sensory-friendly room or corner can work wonders. Using tents, bed covers, or enclosed swings can be helpful at an age appropriate level.

Encourage Open Communication:

Teach your child that it's okay to express their emotions. Encourage them to use visual aids or a feelings chart to help communicate their feelings. A calm down corner that has emotions posters works for this as well as an emotions booklet. This is something your child can easily flip through and show you what they are feeling.

Allow Time for Self-Care:

Incorporate self-care activities into their routine, such as listening to soothing music or engaging in sensory-friendly activities. For some children screen-time may be appropriate. These can help them recharge and fill their cup.

Support and Understanding:

Offer emotional support and understanding. Let your child know that you're there to listen, without judgment, whenever they're ready to share. Tailor your approach as some children get more upset with lengthy conversations and others may need more physical support like sitting with them quietly or offering compression/pressure like message or squeezes.

Conclusion

Understanding the emotional challenges neurodivergent children face after school, especially due to masking, is crucial for effective parenting. By creating a nurturing environment, encouraging open communication, and providing the support they need, you can help your child navigate these emotions and find comfort in being their authentic selves.

Remember, you're not alone on this journey. Follow me and reach out for personalized guidance. Together, we can help your neurodivergent child thrive and express themselves more authentically.